Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player--

Did he just, like, I mean - c'mon guys, I know the squirrels on the island are pushy little jerks but at least I had, like, an understanding with them. I come in to the radio station without, like, putting up a fight, and they let me do things like pick up coffee and stare at the exploded school along the way!

*chittering*

Sure.

Anyway.

Hi, um, Sim Fortywhatever-W. This is Sparkle, like, actually me Sparkle, and I am better dressed than I have ever been in my life right now, and I could have run away from the squirrels and maybe even outrun those blaster rifles the Zin are carrying, but instead I'm here, with notes, which I'm going to read to you. So that, I don't know, presumably we can all rally together and kick ass. There are weird console things outside and helicopters and that just sounds like an invitation to me.

For those not paying attention at home, your home isn't your home, and some jerkass named Zinyak has kidnapped us all. He, like, made an announcement about this yesterday. And the day before. Which mostly involved chiding us like little kids and then doing freaking literary readings, because of course we'd get abducted by a frog-faced creep who thinks we need more Shakespeare in our lives. Of course.

In the dorms, where it's good to see that reading bedroom notes is still creepy even when the dorms are fake, Alex tried to get out of bed, and ended up on the ceiling. Which isn't in bed, so mission accomplished, I guess?

In town, Hannibal and Jono were making plans and trying to make a list of the people who are here when Jono almost put his head through the ceiling? And then there was, like, frog rain, which is... also weird. But I guess the takeaway here is that we should probably try to touch base with one another at some point if we're not evil alien sims and stuff. Edward joined the 'I have powers now, I guess' club by running up a wall, and Bo managed to get her coffee from some uncooperative barista at the Fake-Perk by making it rain fish.

Frogs and fish rain. This place is almost as fucked-up as the real thing.

In the ongoing adventures of people who have been sucked off to even weirder sims, we have Pinkie vanishing to somewhere or other after she interrupted Hardison in his attempt to break out of this place and they both got busted by the Zin. Eliot is still alive and well in a Western when last the squirrels tuned in, and was schooling the locals on this little thing called 'white people are actually less entitled to be here than the Sioux kthx,' and Cara got a spaceship and a crew and a possible romantic arc, and something about space zombies? See, like, I'd be jealous, but you lost me at space zombies.

*Rustling*

And that's all the notes. All that, and these squirrels didn't offer me alcohol even once. Whatever, I'm out of here. I'm gonna commit Grand Theft Auto and keep points for each Zin I hit. It'll be a great time. Sparkle out.